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Friday, April 01, 2005

The Spirit of a02.

you kai here.

to my dearest 05a02,

ive never felt like i did today in a long time.
your faces were downcast, you were robbed of the bond that has sustained you the past three months. you were robbed once, when sheng, brynner, nat and cassandra left, but today, it was evident that it was a heist of gigantic proportions.
i can understand how you feel, the feeling of seperation from something, someone, you hold so dearly to is a painful thing---not just for those who had to leave, but also for those who had to contend with the new developments with nothing in their power to change the outcome.

Throughout my time in NJC, ive been a fighter. Ive fought along with the council to make improvements in the school- to make the school a better place, to make the school a home away from home.I've fought against criticism from my peers, Ive fought to make things happen. Yet, when i was confronted with the sad faces of Rhoda, Ruth, Karen, and Christine today, i could not fight. I was powerless to do anything to help you guys. I tried to make you feel better, but i didnt do it very well. Truth is, I felt as cheated as much as you do, but i tried to hide my emotions. I tried to be rationale about it, i tried to convince you about the constraints of the adminstration, how it was difficult to change classes with just a snap of the fingers. Deep inside, it was a different story. It was emotional turmoil. Deep down, i was praying that some miracle would happen that would keep you guys back in 05a02. I just couldnt show it. I couldnt fight. There was nothing i could do, nothing i can do. Ive never felt so helpless in a long time.

You may question, why something like this is able to make me feel this way, make me feel so strongly helpless. The reason is because you guys are 05a02. you guys, have convinced me that you are a truly united, unpretentious, down to earth, happy go lucky, sweet bunch of people that represents the beautiful side of human nature. look at how far you've come---from your enthusiasm in orientation, to the various activities for chinese new year, including the late night painting sessions, to the talentime entries, to the class outings you had. Through this time, I have, from my position, watched you guys grow, akin to a little flower blossoming into the product that is a carefully-woven bunch of 22 people. Im going to be really frank here. I once felt the same way you did, a long time ago, about 04a02. Like you, we had some crazy times. I still remember the many chill out sessions between classes spent plugging music into the announcement system in our beloved gr34 and everyone singing to the tunes of silly songs. I still remember the time when all of us skipped math lecture ( sadly im still lost at the topic. ha ) to go out and have fun. I still remember the times when almost everyday was spent in town talking, the times when 04a02 came over to my house to stay over and talk, the times when everybody was like everybody in 05a02.

Like you, the JAE came and went, leaving behind tsunami-like effects. the class turnover rate was 50 per cent. Like you, we were initially unreceptive to the idea of integrating with the people from the second intake. Like you, tears were shed, as we struggled to come to terms to the harsh reality that was imposed on a bond so beautiful and sacred that only the people within it could understand. BUT unlike you, the 04a02 spirit died out. the class soon split into factions, people didnt mix the way they did in the past, and to put it curtly in your words, " what class spirit is there? Your class is so damn cliquish." And i agree. Truly, the spirit that once defined us is no longer present. Agendas have changed, alignments shifted, impressions modified, people become different. And when i look at you guys, 05a02, everytime i look at you guys, the truth is. i feel a longing for the times when 04a02 could be as spontaenous and carefree as you guys are. its like when u can just be yourself and no one can judge u for it and you dont really care how and what people see you as; it didnt matter as long as the class understood one another's character and needs, like a brotherly love. In Jc, it is the emotional bonds forged with fellow frens that help you get through the hectic pace and hellish demands of you. 04ao2 may not be that united now, but this only hardens my resolve to make sure that 05a02 does not suffer the same fate that we did. You guys are a constant reminder that something so beautiful and untinted can exist in a world where you'll often see the ugly side of human nature. I do not want the ao2 spirit in you to die off, it would be a shame not just to the school, but to yourselves.

I understand that Ruth, Rhoda, Charmaine, Erni and Liyana have been posted to other classes. Sheng, Brynner and Cass are in other Jcs. Nat is in Poly.It may seem like 05a02 has lost physical interaction with so many of its original members. But i want to stress one thing - 05a02 will always be 05a02 even though you guys may not be together as a class. I want to stress the SPIRIT and ATTITUDE 0f 05a02 as the crux to staying together as one Body. and im speaking about this from personal experience. I feel that its not whether you guys are physically together that is important, rather its the ATTITUDE that you show towards mainting this spirit and bond that is the key to making 05a02 stay TOGETHER as one. You may find yourselves going to lectures together, having lunch together or doing things together, but all these is meaningless UNLESS you all WANT to make a COLLECTIVE EFFORT to maintain the strong emotional connection with each other. Along the way, you may find that it may get to a point where interaction with each other has lost its significance, but whatever you do, dont lose track of the focus to keep the 22 of you together. I cannot help but emphasise the fact that it is not by stroke of luck that the 22 of you are brought together , and consequently not by accidental mistake a 22 complete strangers three months ago are able to form such a deep emotional understanding with each other. Fate has brought you guys together, you only have yourselves to keep this bond going strong. And i have faith in you.

Traffic Light

The light turned green, two cars drove out
a change of shades, a twist of fate,
one stopped, it didnt quite make it,
a blur as the other made for speed.

Two cars, alas different paths-
Yet they moved with purpose
speedily, steadily, though change of shades too many
Alas, still two cars on the same road to paradise.

Heres a poem which i wrote for you guys. Hope you understand the message that im trying to convey to you.

Just wanna say that im really proud of you guys and you are truly the pride of Ignis and NJC. I feel honoured to be able to associate myself with the 22 of you, to be able to serve you as your house captain, ogl and friend. If ever you need someone to talk to, all of us ( Sam, Yux, Vince, Emmi and I ) would be more than willing to hear you out and help you in any way possible. Thank you for giving us, the many wonderful memories together which we can proudly take away with us from our jc experience.

Who dares to mess with us will be bak kwa.
With my sincerest respect,
You Kai

KingADRIANthegreat [11:20 PM]

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